No One Ever Goes That Far Don't Push Your Luck
by Shinshii
Summary: Most people smile at least once everyday. But sometimes when one person smiles, it has a deeper meaning than their own Mother's milk. GinOki Friendship. Slight Shounen-ai. #15 - Slowly Making the Sheep in his Head Die.
1. Smiling Is Way Better Than Mother's Milk

[A/N: This is the first. Constructive Criticism would help..I guess.]

Pairing(s): Gintoki x Sougo [Friendship?]

Okita Sougo has never smiled in a long time, wholeheartedly, no one could make him.

It was silent. Gintoki lazed on the couch like he always does, propping his head up with one of his arms to give it support. While the other hand's small finger went in and out of his nose turning the pages to Shounen Jump's Gintaman. He never really liked the manga, but he read it anyway, because he felt some sort of connection to it, he could not explain it. - Almost done with the chapter, he hears Tap Tap on the window behind his desk. "Shinpachi? Kagura?" The silver-haired man looked confused. Who? Gintoki made it look like it took effort to sit up as he stumbled to his feet. Gintoki came to the conclusion that it was probably Otose or Catherine, Tama would never be that gentle. He made sure to slide the curtains open very carefully with his wooden sword. Nothing moved. He was at a loss for words while he saw the First Division Captain of the Shinsengumi crouched up like Spider-Man on the other side of his window.

Gintoki gave a dead-fish stare. What? "Ah, Danna." Sougo pulled open the window from the other side, "You should close your windows properly." Said the teenager.

Gintoki didn't have time for this, it was almost time for him to do one of his odd-jobs. "Oi. Oi. Could you knock a little more normally? This is like what some evil organization from an anime would do."

"Ah. Sorry, Danna, but you see, I'm looking for my bazooka, could you help?" The Teenager said blandly.

"I have a job to do here, don't go bothering me with this crap. All men have a bazookas in their hearts, so use that, okay?"

"Please don't be that way, Danna." -

Somehow, it ended up with Sougo following Gintoki to help finish his job as payment for helping find the bazooka that was stashed away by Kagura. Gintoki took the lead, telling Sougo to just shut up and follow. Gintoki was holding a rather large bag while he walked to their unknown destination. Gintoki made an abrupt stop when he spotted Shinpachi. "Oiiii! Patsuannn!" the Samurai called over to the boy wearing round glasses. "Ah, Gin-sa-" ! Shinpachi was surprised to see Okita Sougo there. Just what is Gin-san thinking! "Wh..Why is Okita-san here!"

"A young person's life is unpredictable, in this case, it's yours."

Yagyuu Kyuubei was standing in front of a surprisingly large house while she heard clops from afar. Through a forest near the house, something appeared. There, Makoto-chan was. Sougo was riding on Mako-chan dressed up as a prince. "Aah, I'm done for.. I'm completely done for, Oi. I thought it was a wild boar.. but I ended up abducting a prince.." Gintoki winked at Toujou Ayumu, standing by Kyuubei's side.

In front of Sougo and Mako-chan, Kyuubei's cheeks were like an apple's thick shade of red, Gintoki knew this would happen, no one could resist a handsome prin- In the middle of his thoughts, Sougo was kicked off of Makoto-chan's back and Kyuubei boarded instead. Huh? "So wonderful.." said Kyuubei as she petted Mako-chan's [Gintoki's] hair. Huh? No way. No girl would ever pass up the chance to be with a prince. Of course, when girls said something a little too cute, no boy would ever think about getting together with her... Maybe she's just smart?

Next thing Mako-chan knew, Sougo jumped up and tackled Kyuubei. Ayumu worried that Kyuubei would get injured and fired Gintoki and the rest. Shinpachi had already gone home while Gintoki confronted Sougo. "Oi! Didn't you say you were going to help!" Gintoki was pissed. This was one of the easiest jobs that have ever come his way. All ruined by Okita-kun.

"Danna, you see, if a woman hits you, you shouldn't act like a little bitch and take it, if you strike back, that's how they learn who's dominating who." Sougo stated like it was a fact, his voice as bland as ever.

"I don't give a damn about that! Go back and make up an excuse like - "AHH~! A SPIDER!" And beg to be let in and get on their good side! Apologize and I still might get paid!"

Suddenly, a spider appeared in front of Gintoki's face. Gintoki paled. "SPIDER!" Gintoki squeaked in an obnoxiously high voice and threw his arms on different sides of Sougo's waist and docking his head in Sougo's chest. To Gintoki's realization, he let out a fearful chuckle. Sougo snorted and grabbed the spider by the web and ran towards Gintoki with it. Gintoki couldn't help but run away while Sougo chased after him.

But while running after Gintoki, his expression was different, yes, it seemed like he was actually enjoying himself. His cheeks drained with red, a very smiley expression while he was laughing. Yes, Sougo was actually enjoying himself and smiling. And before he knew it, the spider was long gone.

[A/N: Gintaman is a parody of Gintama created for the manga[?] and anime. Makoto-chan is Shinpachi and Gintoki dressed as a centaur, Shinpachi is the back side and Gintoki is the front with his hair combed down and a beard with a defeated look on his face that says - I'm done for. And from Gintama Episode 177, Gintoki yelled "SPIDER" when it crawled on his hands and dove into Tsukuyo's chest.]


	2. We Never Knew Prostitutes Have A Type

Pairing(s): Gintoki x Okita - GinOki [Friendship?]

_Shit._ Sougo was taking shelter under a bridge. It began to rain again during his shift on patrol. It was almost over anyway, so he had nothing to lose. It just took him by surprise, random rain showers have been happening lately, but this one was extreme. - _Pasha_. Sougo could swear he heard that sound behind him. He looked over his shoulder only to find Gintoki. They were literally back to back, but Gintoki didn't seem to notice. All he cared about was getting all the water out of his shoes and drying his yukata which was resting on his arm. Sougo chose to speak first to pass some time, "Oi. Danna."

At first Gintoki looked a bit shocked at the sudden voice that appeared behind him. "_OMAEDO USHIROGI! _DAAAAAA!" Gintoki squealed and turned to kick 'Omaedo Ushirogi', who turned out to be Okita-kun. "Ehh..Okita-kun? Oi. Okita-kun?"

"Danna," Sougo stumbled to his feet and bent a little. "You're afraid of Omaedo Ushirogi?"

"..." Gintoki didn't know what to say, if he said 'Yes.' that would be used against him, if he said 'No.' it might be obvious that he's lying. Sougo nearly chocked on his own spit. It started with a chuckle, then to laughing out loud, he even wiped a tear from his face. "I se-.." His speech was interrupted by his obnoxious laughter. More than he felt like retorting, Gintoki was shocked. _This kid knew how to laugh?_

"Oi. If you always knew how to laugh that obnoxiously why haven't I seen it before?" Gintoki said this a bit lazily, expecting an answer through and through. But instead, Sougo raised his head pointing it towards the opposite of Gintoki and averted his eyes. He still had his straight face, though. This made Gintoki wonder. Gintoki wasn't exactly dense, but there were a few things he just couldn't catch onto.

Well, it's not like it mattered to Gintoki, anyway, but just out of curiosity.. "Okita-kun? The answer."

"..."

"Oi. What is there not to say?"

"..Ah, you're right, Danna. There is something to say. That was all fake." _Huh? _This kid might as well become an actor, Gintoki sure was fooled by his act. As the rain let up, Sougo picked up his jacket and dusting off his pants. "Time to go." He mumbled. And walked away. Around an area that was not audible to Gintoki, Sougo gave a slight chuckle one more time and when back to his normal facade. _It was realization._

[A/N: Well, that was it. I don't have any skills in writing, so I apologize for that.. I only Role-Played a couple of times.. But if I even have a few readers, I'm okay with that. Criticism is always welcome in reviews. And no, Sougo won't be OOC, actually I think that he was kind of IC.. Remember that time with Mitsuba? He had a major character change.]


	3. No Use Crying Over Mommy's Spilt Milk

Pairing(s): No Pairings.

The Demon Vice-Commander of the Shinsengumi was tired of waiting for the First Division Captain of the Shinsengumi to show up to the meeting. He couldn't count on Kondo Isao, the Gorilla Commander to watch over the crowd, since he was being hospitalized. Meanwhile, Yamazaki, an officer, would take over his place at the meeting for the time being. Yamazaki couldn't exactly say that he was used to these types of things. The young officer hoped for the best while waiting for the Vice-Commander to return, maybe he could stall them for some time, that was one thing he was skilled at; stalling.

Hijikata ran along the hallway outside the Shinsengumi's base resembling a traditional Japanese house. He harshly slid open the door to the room that he knew Sougo would be occupying. "SOUUUG-!" What he saw had surprised him. There, Sougo was, as he knew he would be, but who was also there was none other than that damn Yorozuya Boss. In _our_ uniform! 'Why is _he_ here?' What's more, they seemed to be having a good time, with all the half-eaten dango and open Shounen Jump issues littering the floor. Hijikata was at a loss for words. "What the fuck happened to Shoujo Be-! ...SOUGO! WHY IS HE HERE!"

"Ah, Hijikata-san, you see, as you know, Kondo-san is being hospitalized and I remembered that Danna could fill in for Kondo-san for a little while as a Yorozuya." Sougo said blandly.

"Yes, but _why_ him? Why couldn't you get the glasses boy! He's hard-boiled when he needs to be! Or even the monster girl! This guy is just an annoyingly lazy good-for-nothing!"

"Well, the Otaku is not an accomplice of mine and the monster girl gets on my nerves, I would never ask her for a favor, thus, the new Commander for a short period of time is born!"

- "WAHH!" Hijikata raised his head with a start. The room was dark, and familiar, his room? "Oh, it was just a dream.."


	4. We Paddle Hard To Succeed

**Paring(s):** Gintoki x Sougo [A little more than friendship today?]

Okita Sougo was sitting on the couch across from Gintoki's, which was closer to his television. Gintoki harbored an uninterested expression, almost like Sougo's straight face. Gintoki sighed, "So why does Gin-san have to do this?"

"Because today's my birthday."

Gintoki didn't get it. _He's 18, why would he celebrate his birthday? Especially with me._ Sure they've had connections in the past, he even helped him save Hijikata, but he still didn't get it. "Why can't you get Hijikata-kun or the Gorilla to do it? Aren't they your friends, why must I listen to you, anyway?"

"Because today I'm the prince." Sougo remarked lazily.

Gintoki scoffed and burst out laughing. "..Gin-san's stomach hurts!" Gintoki managed as he clutched his stomach and laid down on his back. Gintoki couldn't believe Sougo actually said that. Sougo stood up and walked over to Gintoki, placed his hand down next to Gintoki's head on the open [left] side. "Today I'm the prince." Sougo repeated himself.

Gintoki's expression quickly changed into a lazy frown then grabbed Sougo's wrist, "Sorry, I couldn't get any presents." Gintoki gave a dismissive wave. He wasn't particularly interested in Sougo's personal life, so he wanted to avoid celebrating his birthday with him at all costs. "Can't you celebrate, with the woman you like, or something? Gin-san doesn't have the time to play."

"Danna, it's true that I have someone on my mind, but I can't ask them again, because I alrea-" Sougo was cut off by the door suddenly sliding open. Shinpachi had his CD Player in his hands giving a satisfied blush while he sang the lyrics to one of Otsuu-chan's songs. When Shinpachi finally looked towards the living room [?], he gasped. Shinpachi dropped his CD Player, the ear-buds fell out of his ears along with it. He pointed at Gintoki and Sougo, while his entire body shook. "H-how..! Why! Gin-san! Don't tell me.. You did, didn't you? GIN-SAN!"

"Shut up, Shinpachi. Being this loud in the morning.." Gintoki released Sougo's arm and scratched the back of his silver hair. _Well, we were in a terribly questionable position.._

"Okita-kun arrived just a few minutes ago, jeez." His pinkie finger was up his nose, so it muffled his voice a little. "What were you thinking, anyway, Patsuan? Gin-san wouldn't do anything like that with a brat."

Gintoki closed his eyes as the whole situation was explained to Shinpachi by Sougo. Shinpachi calmed down a bit but he was still eager to know why Sougo would ask Gintoki to celebrate with him. - "It's not like Danna actually has any jobs today, right?" Sougo continued. Shinpachi thought for a minute and showed about a quarter of a small white piece of paper that he was almost done pulling out from his keikogi. "Actually.." Shinpachi started, but when he noticed Sougo remove his sword from the sheath he freaked and became silent. Gintoki slightly opened one of his eyes, but the sword was already out of sight. "N..No. Today, no one requested an odd job from Gin-san." Shinpachi stated in a shaky voice.

Shinpachi's actions left Gintoki wondering, but it's not like he has ever heard Shinpachi sincerely lie before. Sougo looked over to Gintoki. "There you have it, Danna." Shinpachi smiled awkwardly. "Well then.." He stood up and decided to leave the two alone, and exited the house.

When Sougo got up to switch couches again, he accidentally tripped over his sheath, and lost balance, his head almost hit Gintoki's, but he stopped himself a second before that happened. They were even closer than before. It was silent until Kagura furiously slid open her room door [closet?] and yawned. "Kagu-!" Gintoki started, but was stopped, he didn't know why. He forgot about the position he was in, and when he lifted his head he accidentally kissed Sougo. Gintoki wasn't blushing. Gintoki wasn't happy. He was stunned, it took him about 15 seconds until he realized he should release Sougo's lips. Sougo bent over to pick up his sheath and sword, then walked over to the quarter-open door. Gintoki opened his mouth to say something, but Sougo started first. "Thank you for the birthday present. But Danna, today wasn't my birthday." He exited and closed the door behind him. On the other side, Sougo stood there for a good 3 minutes, with his right hand covering his mouth, it took a while until he realized he was blushing furiously.

Gintoki was speechless, he had nothing to say.

[A/N: Well, that's it.. This was kinda like a birthday present I gave myself /yesterday was my birthday/.]


	5. Live With What You Already Have

[A/N: Ahaha, thanks for the positive reviews, chapters 1-3 aren't any good compared to 4. Believe me, I noticed. Maybe I was just in the mood? Don't expect this to be any good.. Meh. Give ideas!]

**Pairing(s):** None. Just Yamazaki's Struggles.

Yamazaki realized he has never gotten a proper 'thank you' before. _Is that normal?_ Those words would always run through Yamazaki's mind. He was the hardest worker of all of the Shinsengumi. To him, the Shinsengumi are a bunch of lazy asses that never take their job seriously, especially his superiors. With Hijikata making him do the dirty work. And Sougo's constant threaths, Yamazaki never had much time to himself. Since their useless commander only stalked Otae 24/7, the Shinsengumi was always out of order. There was only one man who Yamazaki could count on.

Yamazaki found himself in front of "Yorozuya Gin-chan". He knocked on the door numerous times, _no answer. Is he not here?_ When Yamazaki turned to leave, he heard footsteps. "Oh, Da-!" _What?_ He couldn't believe what he saw. Sougo was standing right in front of him. "Eh? Zaki, what are you doing here?"

Yamazaki couldn't answer, most likely out of shock. _Since when did Danna and Okita-san have such a good connection?_ _Or mayb-_ His train of thought was cut off by the sudden screaming in the opposite direction.

"Sada-" the voice cut off. "SADAHARU! ~~" Both Sougo and Yamazaki looked down and saw Gintoki being pulled by a huge white dog. Gintoki released his grasp on the dog's collar, he didn't want to be pulled all the way across Kabukicho. But when he let go him, Sadaharu stopped, too. Gintoki wondered about what he was looking at.

Gintoki sat across from Yamazaki and Sougo, bored as ever. "What?" He wanted to keep things short. Yamazaki spoke first. "What do you mean by _what_, what were _you_ doing, Danna?" Sougo twitched a little.

"What does it look like? I was walking the mutt, of course." Gintoki pointed up towards Sadaharu, who was currently having his way with his head.

"_Walking it?_ More like _it_ was walking _you_!"

"Don't be stupid. If you looked more closely, I had full control of him."

"Right.." Yamazaki had no desire to countinue any further into this subject, it was obvious what was happening in the first place.

Gintoki's head was bleeding uncontrollably, after he got up to dress the wound, Sougo tilted his head a little towards Gintoki's direction. "What do you think Dan-" Yamazaki couldn't help but notice his captain's sword at his neck. "_Danna. _That word is not for you to say." _Why did he turn into a sadist for that!_ Tears trickled down Yamazaki's cheeks.

They ended up leaving without really saying anything. Yamazaki knew that he was far away from his long-awaited "thank you."


	6. Don't Underesitmate a Super Sadist

**Pairing(s):** Gintoki x Sougo [GinOki. Sadistic Amusement].

"So?"

Gintoki was called out by Sougo. This was the third time this week, and he never really got to the point. All he talked about was pointless crap like weather when it was obviously dark outside in that annoyingly monotone, almost never changing voice of his. Gintoki was getting sick of it. He wondered himself why he would always end up coming in the first place. Maybe it was because everytime Sougo would order him a chocolate parfait. But Gintoki was starting to feel if the conversation wasn't about torturing Hijikata, he had no reason to be there.

"So?" Gintoki repeated himself indignantly. He was beginning to get impatient, it's already been 5 minutes and Sougo hadn't even uttered a word yet.

"..." Sougo slightly opened his mouth. "Did you enjoy it?" Sougo was sitting across from Gintoki. They were at Snack Smile, which was where Otae worked, but Sougo declined any service from the female hostesses, so it was only Gintoki and Sougo.

"Eh?" Gintoki had no idea about what he was talking about, Sougo hadn't yet ordered his chocolate parfait.

Sougo didn't reply. _1 second.. 2 seconds.. 3 seconds.._ Sougo's right arm fidgeted a little. Gintoki couldn't exactly see what was happening, the table was in the way.

_A cellphone?_ Sougo raised his hand and revealed a small black item with the Shinsengumi insignia on the front. Gintoki didn't understand what this had to do with anything, he just sat silently and watched.

Sougo's next movement was when he flipped the mobile phone open.

Gintoki couldn't _believe_ his eyes. Gintoki pratically slid across the table and slammed the phone shut. This attracted other people's attention, but they quickly went back to their own business.

Sougo showed Gintoki a picture of the kiss the two shared just the other day, Gintoki tried hard to forget about it, and almost succeeded, too. What bothered Gintoki even more was the fact that he gave his usual blatant expression of boredom while he showed Gintoki that embarrassing accident.

'Okita-kun.. How the _hell_ did you get that? Delete it!' Gintoki pleaded in a lowered voice.

"Danna, I wouldn't delete my background. Don't you know that only important things can be my background?" Sougo smirked a little.

_!_ 'Eh!' Gintoki panicked in terror, dismay and everything else that were similar. Now that Gintoki thought of it, he never did press any buttons before he showed it to him. _Did anyone see it? _

It was his background afterall, he wouldn't be surprised if at least one person knew. Even though it was an accident, Gintoki knew that what little of a reputation he had left would all go down the drain. Not to mention their quite obvious age-gap. What would the others think?

A light noise brought him back to reality. During all that thinking Sougo must have ordered him a chocolate parfait. But it was different, it smelled a bit weird. Gintoki looked down at one of his favorite desert and noticed something different. There was a new topping.

_Mayonnaise._

Gintoki looked over at Sougo with bright smile, but in reality his face was beaded with sweat. "Okita-kun. What the hell is this?" Gintoki pointed at the abomination.

Sougo didn't say anything, but instead raised the mobile phone with his finger sandwiched between the middle of the top and bottom part. Gintoki received the message and gulped, he rose his spoon and helped himself.

_2 minutes of Hell._

Gintoki ate as fast as he could, but it still took that long to finish, it was a mountain of mayonnaise. Gintoki guzzled in his own spit as a tear trickled down his cheek from his right eye.

He hoped Sougo was satisfied. 'De.. Delete..' Gintoki gasped in his overly raspy voice.

Sougo pointed down towards the table, Gintoki complied and slumped towards the floor. Sougo took a good look at Gintoki's lips which covered in mayonnaise, as expected.

_A light, yet forceful touch?_ Gintoki felt something on his lips. Gintoki was too preoccupied with his own misery to pay any mind. He heard foot steps from the opposite direction about 40 seconds later. _Maybe Okita-kun is leaving?_

Sougo walked towards the exit with his lips smothered in mayonnaise. He wiped the white substance off his face with his thumb and licked it. 'Hijikata-san was right.. Mayonnaise aren't half bad..' Sougo pecked the top of his phone's screen, gave it a small, yet playful smile, and was gone.

[A/N: Oh, and no, I don't have anything against age-gaps. I actually enjoy the ones that aren't too big. Please ignore spelling mistakes, if any. Thank you.]


	7. Red is for Strawberries Not Hearts

**Pairing(s):** None. [Just Gin-san today.]

There he lay. Gintoki rested on a soft patch of green grass. He was enjoying himself quite a bit, with that slight breeze blowing in his face. No Kagura. No Shinpachi. _Just Gin-san._

But somehow his thoughts wandered onto something different when he closed his eyes. _Okita-kun_. He thought it'd pass, but it didn't exactly do that, quite the opposite. Gintoki just accepted the thought and kept it.

Gintoki didn't exactly dislike the teenager, nor his presence. Maybe he was just reluctant to admit that he was slightly starting to enjoy it. He did start to appear around him quite often lately, maybe it's to be expected. He was quite interesting, and kind of like his partner in crime, so to say. Maybe he started to accept the teenager as more of a frieind than an enemy. Probably because Gintoki started getting the feeling of being enlightened by that rare, bright smile, since he didn't expect to see that himself in the first place.

[A/N: Yes, short.]


	8. He Asked Us For Tomatoes Not Potatoes

**Pairing(s):** Gintoki x Sougo [GinOki. Friendship?]

Yamazaki was on a job with Sougo. But the two weren't exactly doing it correctly. Sougo was to preoccupied jotting down notes about something that excited him quite abit. Yamazaki was sparking his an-pan again out of the window of the apartment they were located in. "Oh!"

Sougo paused and looked up. "What, Zaki, find anything?" Yamazaki turned to face his captain. "No.. I hit someone." Yamazaki's voice swayed.

- An-pan dripped down from Gintoki's forehead and hair. Yamazaki was quite scared and handed him a clean towel with his left and that was currently trembling. Gintoki glared at him with his eyes that looked more like a dead-fish's than angry. Maybe it was on purpose. Gintoki snatched the towel and cleaned his face. Yamazaki thought that it was okay until Gintoki slammed him face first into the tatami mats.

Gintoki glanced at the bag full of An-pan, took it and craddled it on his right arm. He was about to leave when Sougo stopped him when he clutched his shoulder. He opened his mouth to say something just about when Gintoki slightly grinned as silenced him with a small, partially thing red box which covered his lips and dropped into his hands. "Pretty considerate of me, huh?" He starred down at the box, mouth slightly hanging open, as Gintoki waved and left.

Sougo starred at it for a while, opened and closed it, then pushed it into his coat pocket.

_Custom-Made lynched Hijikata plushie for a Birthday present?_ Even though he thought that, Sougo still smiled brightly. Even his own birthday party couldn't compare to this small act of kindness.

[A/N: Similar to Chapter 4? Except it's kinda the real thing. And no, he doesn't age.]


	9. Work Hard For Mommy

**Pairing(s):** GinOki [Gintoki x Sougo]

_**Feeding**_

Sougo was seated at a nearby Dango Shop during one of his many breaks, except this one was actually appointed to him instead of taking it into his own hands. He hadn't exactly order anything yet, he was too busy starring at the silver tuft to his right. He could've mistaken it for the color gray and what turned out to be behind the umbrella was some old man, but he took his chances, anyway. Sougo walked over normally and peaked down, "Eh?" So he was right. There Gintoki lay, probably sleeping with an issue of Shounen Jump to his chest. It was amazing how he could find even a wooden table comfortable to sleep on. Sougo blew a small gust of wind coming from his mouth into the receiver's face. Gintoki, at first, had a muggy expression, but later turned into something more suprised. "Ah." Gintoki sat up and scratched the back of his bed-ridden hair. Nothing really changed, or at least the change wasn't really noticeable, since he hair was always like that. Sougo took a seat next to Gintoki, after this came an awkward silence. Gintoki was the first to speak. "Eh? Okita-kun, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be over there?"

"Danna, this seat is the only one with shade." His eyes turned upwards as he pointed at the red Japanese parasol above them.

Gintoki looked around the small area and shurgged it off. He might as well eat something before he goes to sleep again. Gintoki wasn't particularly fond of his company, but it's better him than _others._ Sougo was the first to order, Gintoki was surprised to see Sougo order _two _plates of dango and _two_ cups of tea.

"Okita-kun, do you somehow train rigorously to lose all your body fat like in the manga?" The question was asked quite seriously by Gintoki, it seemed like he really wanted to know. Sougo shrugged and ate what was on the first plate. But Gintoki noticed how he kept on looking up and down from the other plate to the plate clutched in his hands. Gintoki was quite amused by his actions and forgot to order for himself. After the last bite Gintoki finally snapped out of it and turned his head. "Oi, Oss-" His speech was interrupted by the dango that was viciously stuck in his mouth. Gintoki's only choice was to eat it because Sougo's hand hadn't yet let go of the stick.

Mouth open, Gintoki walloped in his own pain ready to throw up. Sougo was already heading back to his job when he turned around to look at Gintoki one last time. _It's strange.. I think I did something wrong._

_**Holding Hands**_

Gintoki and Sougo were walking along side each other after one of Sougo's meetings with Katsura which involved Gintoki's house and he wanted Sougo to pay for the damage. Funny how two people could meet many times all in one day. _Eh? _Gintoki's eyes slightly widened. Sougo slightly raised his speed to be infront of Gintoki. Gintoki looked at the teenager's hand stretched out in front of him. Gintoki constantly looked from Sougo to his hand, he gave him the sign that meant something along the lines of _Wait a minute_ as he dug into his yukata. Sougo gave an annoyed expression when he found that instead of a hand, a strawberry lollipop rested in his palm. Even though he decided to suck on the lollipop, he was still a little pissed. Sougo dove in for Gintoki's hand but fell flat on his face when Gintoki suddenly lifted his hand and pointed towards the shop he usually goes to for repairs.

Gintoki turned his head over his shoulder to see what happened after he had heard a _Bump_ behind him. "Okita..kun?" Gintoki said with slight curiousity. Sougo stumbled to his knees. "..."

_**Finally.. But Drunk!..**_

After a long day, Sougo had to be responsible for carrying Gintoki back home after he couldn't seem to walk straight when he left the bar. Even for a teenager with a well-built physique, such as Sougo, Gintoki was still heavier than he was so it slowed him down a bit. He was half way there when something stopped him. Sougo looked down surprised to see Gintoki's hand clutched onto his, not only that, but a lollipop was dug into his mouth as well. _Strawberry?_ Sougo decided to walk back exactly like that the whole way.

[A/N: Like it? What do you think? It's my first time doing something like this. Part 1 was the main story and the others were just for the heck of it, so that's why they're smaller. Spelling mistakes?]


	10. Safety Before Sadistic Pleasure

**Pairing(s): **Gintoki x Sougo [GinOki. I guess you can say that..]

A stream of blood spurted out of Shinpachi's mouth. He couldn't believe his eyes. Kagura running out of the apartment with her hands flailing around in the air was one thing, but this was _another._ If he had known these two occurrences were connected, he wouldn't have even bothered walking up the stairs.

_How many times has it been? How many times has Okita-san come here! _He recalled Gintoki and Sougo having no special connection just about a month ago. _...Maybe I'm just seeing things.. Right! _He quickly slid the door shut, this caught both Gintoki and Sougo's attention. When Shinpachi slid the door open again, he noticed something slightly different from the fact that Sougo was sitting right there. _Gin-san's expression...is different. _Gintoki looked as he was about ready to kill himself. Accepting the fact Sougo was already there, Shinpachi rushed over to Gintoki.

'Gin-san! What's wrong!' Shinpachi's left hand rested on Gintoki's shoulder.

'Mmm..!' Gintoki whispered back in a raspy voice. His eyes were blood-shot.

Shinpachi took careful steps back and rushed to the kitchen. From what Sougo and Gintoki could hear from the living room[?], cabinets opened and closed until Shinpachi ran back to Gintoki and slid the contents of a large bag down his throat. _Sugar._ It read in Japanese Kanji.

After a few seconds while Gintoki was still being fed by Shinpachi, his hands clutched the bag and he took it for himself. They had to wait a while before he finally let go of it and placed it down on the coffee table in front of him.

Shinpachi calmed down and whispered his question in Gintoki's ear once more. _...! _Shinpachi would've had a heart attack if he was any older, he couldn't believe what he had just heard. Shinpachi thought again about it, making sure he had heard correctly.

_Okita-san helped walk Gin-san home, and apparently he stayed here for the night since it was too late, the couch was too uncomfortable.. So Gin-san welcomed him into his room still slightly drunk.. And they did this and that together... _Shinpachi gave a sigh of relief. _Wait!_ The last line repeated in Shinpachi's head again and again like a bullet.

_This and That.. This and That.. This and That.. This and That.. This and That.. This and That.. ... ... Don't tell me!_

Shinpachi had a breif spasm attack on the floor. .._SEX! _Shinpachi choked out. He sat up and wheezed.

'This is not completely true, right?' Shinpachi was desperate as his hands grabbed Gintoki's collar. He didn't want to know what would happen if this was all true.

Gintoki looked away and shrugged slowly. 'He always answers 'Maybe' or 'Probably' to whatever I ask.' Even though Gintoki's voice tried to keep calm, his face obviously showed the exact opposite of whatever was going on in his head.

Shinpachi's expression lightened and plopped down next to Gintoki. 'I'll help, Gin-san.'

There was a sudden flash in Gintoki's eyes. 'Can you do it, Patsuan?' Gintoki's voice was suddenly deeper. 'Of course!' Shinpachi balled his right hand into a fist. He just couldn't let this slide.

They both turned to Sougo with the bottom of their lips sunken into their mouths. Even though they seemed quite brave a second ago, they're still hesitant to learn the truth. Gintoki lifted both of his arms in front of him, elbows bent. He was still shaking, though. "O..Okita-kun..?" His voice was almost as shaky as his body.

Sougo had been starring at them for the whole time, so facing them wasn't really necessary. "Danna."

"P-p-p-pe-pe-pe.." Shinpachi looked over at Gintoki with buldged, strained eyes.

"_Jugem-Jugem Shit-Tossing The Life Of Shin-chan's Two-Day-Old Underwear Balmung Fezalion Isaac Schneider 1/3True Love 2/3 Hangnail Anxiety Betreyal Knows My Name Or Does It Really Ignore Calls Squid Dogfish Halibut Trout-Cod Dogfish This Is a Different Dogfish, I'm Talking About The Dogfish Shark Kaluga Angler Ray Yuuteimiyaoukimukou Pepepepepepepepepepepepe All's Well That Ends Well Runny Diarrhea_" Gintoki said in a lively matter with a slight laugh at the end, yet Sougo stayed silent.

It was getting awkward between them just when something or someone crashed through the door. They all faced the same direction as Kondo imerged from the reckage. _Go-Gorilla [Ko-Kondo-san]..!_ Gintoki and Shinpachi thought mutually. Kondo ran over and rubbed his face on Gintoki's. Gintoki squinted his eyes and pushed his palm on Kondo's cheek. "Oi. Oi." Gintoki tried pushing Kondo back. "I hope your not as stubborn as a Gorilla."

"Shut up!" Kondo spat. "What did you bastards do to Sougo!" Kondo had tears in his eyes as he pulled back and pointed towards Sougo. Gintoki and Shinpachi both couldn't speak for themselves. They were lost for words. Sougo sighed as if it was old news already. "Danna and I-" Gintoki punched Sougo in the stomach while Shinpachi held Kondo back. "Shut up! It's not proven yet!" Gintoki's voice became higher.

"S..Sougo! Shinpachi-kun, let me go! Listen to your elder brot-!" Kondo was whacked to the ground before he could even finish that sentence. "Just WHO'S my elder brother!" Shinpachi yelled in his face.

Shinpachi continued to stomp on Kondo until Gintoki seperated the two. Gintoki kicked Kondo over to the other couch next to Sougo. Gintoki decided to treat it like old news, too. There was no use making a fuss over something that.._could ruin my life._ "Gorilla, wipe the shit out of your ears and listen up!" Gintoki wanted to handle this as smoothly as possible. "I guess Kagura brought you over, right?" When Kondo nodded Gintoki continued. "It's because your one and only 'Sougo'! He made a ridiculous lie and thought we would believe it!" Kondo thought about is as Gintoki turned his head towards Shinpachi and they both nodded in agreement.

"But Danna, it wasn't really a li-" Gintoki tried to get to Sougo in time, but failed. "e. You really had sex with me." Kondo almost died from the shocking news. When Kagura explained it to him, she didn't comprehend it correctly and he didn't properly understand, but now he heard more than needed.

Gintoki and Kondo got into a short-term fight just when Sougo stood up. He raised his hand passively. "Sorry, Danna. It was just a lie." Sougo said as he walked away. It was like time stopped in that room for a few seconds right after Sougo left as Gintoki, Shinpachi and Kondo all fell to the ground.

"...How can people crouch like that?" Sougo muttered as he rubbed the back of his pants. "Next time, Danna should take responsibility... Well, at least he doesn't have to worry.. For now."


	11. We Forget Our First Word Sooner or Later

**Pairing(s): **No pairings [Only a conversation].

"Souuuugo!" Kondo burst into the room. "Wh-what was that, just now!" His knees were shaking as he pointed towards the door. Kondo had just returned from 'Yorozuya Gin-chan', but he had thought Sougo's behavior was strange before he left. He had never imagined Sougo would try to find fun in _that_, even if it was a lie. _Or so he had said._

Sougo turned around from his program, _Pedoro_, and clicked the remote to turn the television off. Since the day was almost to an end, he was dressed in his common attire. He changed his sitting position from cross-legged to traditional style. "What is it, Gorilla?" Sougo said in that never-ending monotone voice. Kondo didn't pay any attention to the _Gorilla_ remark, that always happened when Sougo heard Gintoki calling him Gorilla, too. "_That! That!_ What was _that!_"

"Oh, _that_?" Sougo widened his eyes a little while Kondo nodded vigorously. "A lie." Sougo said simply.

Kondo was beginning to get impatient. "Sougo!" He screamed into his face. "What was _that_!"

"Repeating yourself won't help, Kondo-san."

"There is no way you would even lie about doing _that_ with that low-life Sakata, right! Tell me it's a lie, Sougo!"

"Ah, you caught me. It was all a lie." Sougo said sarcastically.

"No! You're lying!" Kondo shreaked. Sougo thought this was never going to end. "Yes. Yes. Kondo-san. Pedoro is a good program, huh?" Sougo might as well change the subject.

"Huh? Oh, I guess you're right." Kondo paused for a moment before yelling towards the door again. "_GINTOKIIII!"_ Sougo blinked twice, eyes wider. "Eh, Kondo-san, who's that?" Kondo gasped while his mouth was left hanging. "You're telling me you don't know _his _name!"

"Whose name?" Kondo could hardly believe it, he placed his hand on Sougo's head. "Sakata."

"Sakata?"

"Sakata, Gintoki."

"Sakata, Gintoki?"

Kondo paused for a moment and thought about it. _When was the last time someone said his name around Sougo?_ Then, it hit Kondo. "Gin-san. Gin-chan. Yorozuya." Those were the only three versions of his name Sougo actually knew. "Eh? Your saying his name isn't _Gi-_?" Sougo turned around confused, and attempted to repeat his name several times after that. _NO! NO! NO!_ Kondo squeezed his head with both hands, elbows held up in the air. "S-Sougo!" This caused him to turn around.

"Kagura."

"Monster Girl."

"Kagura." Kondo repeated, slightly relieved.

Sougo shrugged, then sighed. "Kagura."

"S-S-S-Shinpachi."

"Shinpachi."

"Gintoki." Kondo was near berserk.

"Gi- Gi-" Sougo paused for a moment. "_n_-" Noticing the 'N' came out funny, he stopped and looked up.

_Eh? Sougo's never averted his eyes like that before. Eh? No! No! No! _Kondo dashed out of the room, yelling gibberish. "Kondo-san?"

[**A/N: **Well, that's it. I'm thinking of starting another FanFiction, maybe it won't turn out good..maybe this one isn't, too? Well, I have a lot of ideas, so might as well give it a try while I'm still considering doing it. Oh, yeah, for those who are actually reading this, more reviews would help. Knowing that more than two people are reading would make me feel better and much more motivated. But I'm still fine with two readers, that's more than enough, just saying to lend a helping hand. Thank you.]


	12. That's the Kind of Man Mommy Is

**Pairing(s):** No particular pairings.

Kondo, Kagura, Shinpachi and Hijikata all sat around one table, with Gintoki, of course. Everyone was restless, but Gintoki just tapped his feet in rhythm impatiently. "So." He began. "What's going on?" Gintoki didn't have time to waste with this crap, his show was going to be on at 5:00 pm.

"Well." Hijikata removed the cigarette from his mouth and blew the smoke towards the ceiling. "Yamazaki saw _it_." Gintoki scrunched his eyes. "What's _it_? How am I supposed to know what _it_ means, huh! Read the air, Toushi!"

"Don't call me Toushi!" Hijikata stood up abruptly but silently went back into his seat.

Gintoki raised his feet to the table top. "Spit it out!" Kagura looked over to Shinpachi. "..Gin-san. We never knew you were that type of guy." He said with a sigh as he shook his head. "Huh?"

"The picture..Yamazaki-san saw it.."

"What picture?" Gintoki didn't recall any _picture_ with him in it. They all shook their heads. "Idiot son!" Kagura dug her head into her hands. "You can change, come back to us. Apologize to Pappy."

"Just _what_ are you guys talking about?"

"..." The room was silent until Kondo suddenly rose. "YAMAZAKI SAW THE PICTURE OF YOU AND OUR SOUGO LOCKING LIPS!" Kondo yelled, tears flowing. Gintoki placed his hand on his head and thought of the idea as absurd. _Birthday.. Not Birthday.. Mayonnaise.._ Gintoki gasped. "Gorilla! Wh-!" Gintoki calmed.

"Gorilla. What are you talking about? What picture? What lips? What are you talking about, eh!" Gintoki's voice was at a higher pitch than before. Kagura dashed out of the room as Shinpachi ran after her. Hijikata sighed. "You really disappointed them. I, too, never knew you swung that way." Gintoki stomped on the table and grabbed Hijikata by his collar. All in time for Sougo to arrive and observe what was going on.

Gintoki threw Hijikata at him. "OI! YOU! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! I TOLD YOU TO DELETE THAT!" Sougo struggled to push Hijikata off of him. "Ah."

"Not 'Ah'! Answer me!" Gintoki put one foot on Sougo's stomach. "Ah, _Gi-_Danna, if you're that close, you'll embarrass me." Sougo said obnoxiously loud. Gintoki lodged Sougo's head into the wooden floor and turned around to see both Kondo and Hijikata shocked out of their minds. "What, guys? He was just kidding, right, Souichirou-kun?" Sougo brushed particles of wood off of his hair and clothes. "It's Sougo." Gintoki looked at Sougo, stunned.

'Okita-kun, answer the question.' Gintoki smiled awkwardly.

Sougo raised an eyebrow. 'Danna, do you really want to know the answer to your question?' He answered playfully. Hijikata and Kondo both looked at eachother as the two men continued their silent conversation. They weren't sure who was right or wrong anymore. Hijikata was just about to leave the room when he had bumped into someone.

"Yamazaki!" Hijikata exclaimed. Hijikata realized what was going on when he saw that both Kagura and Shinpachi followed behind him. They all paused, and in a matter of minutes, everyone was seated again.

"Hijikata-san-" Kagura raised a hand to Yamazaki's face and frowned. She got up to kick Sougo in the stomach. What all caught their attention after he had fallen was the small black item on the floor that was cracked open. Shinpachi bent over to pick it up and shortly after fainted, followed by the rest. The item was Sougo's cellphone, with, of course, the same background as before.

Gintoki sighed and thought about how he was going to clear up this troublesome mess.

Sougo moved closer to his face, which caught Gintoki's attention and whispered. "_Gi-_" Sougo frowned. "Call me 'Sougo'."

Sadly, Gintoki suffered the same fate as the rest. While Sougo carried Gintoki out of the room, he didn't bother with the rest.


	13. FanFiction Aren't Just 'Fun & Games'

**Pairing(s): **None.

_Gintoki clasped Hijikata's throbbing hands. "O-one more time." Hijikata moaned. But it's not like Gintoki was concerned to begin with. No hesitation. The towering male implanted his x*xx-_

Gintoki swooned with a _Thud _into his cushioned seat. He has had enough of this computer. He had had enough of the Internet. He wished he had never traded his VCR for this load of crap. "What type of shit are they trying to pull!"Gintoki fumed as he pointed ominously at the screen. "What is GinHiji! What is GinZura!" The silver haired freelancer sighed in disbelief that people _actually make this stuff._ _One of the downsides of being in an anime_. Gintoki supposed.

How do people come up with this stuff? Gintoki wanted a refund, he couldn't find any of the things he _actually _wanted to see on this shitty thing people call Internet now-a-days. He had spent _all day_ trying to find it, too.

Gintoki groggily departed towards the couch. He plopped onto the funiture he now classified as a 'bed'. Or at least the closest thing to it. "At least make more of GinOki.." Before he had time to repent for what he had just said; he was already asleep.

[**A/N: **It's a drabble.]


	14. Shitty Monkeys Can't Reach Their Bananas

**Pairing(s): **None.

'I want to kill Hijikata..' Sougo mumbled in his sleep.

It was pretty common for Kondo to hear this in the morning, but something else wasn't. 'I want to f*ck with Danna..' Was something Kondo wasn't used to hearing in the morning. Kondo was disturbed by the thought of Sougo losing his innocence to that silver-permed freelancer.

_Was I wrong not to suspect something that other time!_ Kondo slammed his head against the door until he bled. Kondo formed what nearly resembled a trollface.

_No. Most of the fandoms have Kagura-chan paired with Sougo.._ _Wait, wouldn't that make Sougo a pedoph-_


	15. Slowly Making the Sheep in his Head Die

**Disclaimer: **Gintama belongs only to the hysterical genius, Sorachi Hideaki; not me.

Sougo tossed and turned. He was almost absolutely certain he'd faced all the abnormal positions of the room. The alarm clock, his terribly hi-tech sword, the rice-paper sliding door, and somehow, even the tatami mats; nothing had worked. Sougo had never been in such uncomfortable sleeping positions in his life. Maybe his dissatisfaction was because of the never ending drops of water making their way slowly into the sink which handle Sougo was too lazy and exhausted at the current moment to turn off [in order to find even a small amount of peace]. Or perhaps because of his general's inconsistent, inhumane snoring. Though, he did not know how this could have had anything to do with anything concerning uncomfortably annoying sleeping positions. His late elder sister, Mitsuba, had always reminded him to get the proper amount of sleep a 'growing boy', at least in her eyes, required. Thus leading to his constant slacking during the job. But due to currently frequent late-night stake-outs the Shinsengumi were assigned to handle, and being the 1st Squad's Captain of said association, Sougo had been prevented from following his never previously broking slumber routine. And finally, on a night lacking these late-night jobs, he was unable to find sleep.

'_Sleeping mask? ..Check.'_

'_Pajamas? ..Check.'_

'_Hidden Knife? ..Check.'_

Sougo created a small list of everything that could have been missing that could cause him to not meet sleep properly.

There could only have been one.

The absence of the silver-haired dunce, samurai free-lancer, the possessor of the silver soul. Or rather, in other words, Sougo's childish lover. Sougo usually always gone over his house for sleep-overs on the regular daily-basis; making another routine ruined.

Sougo, knowing no other way, gathered his hand-made voodoo dolls.

'_Kondo-san…No.'_

'_Idiot Hijikata…No.'_

'_Monster Girl…No.'_

The boy carefully surveyed his dolls until his hand, sluggish in movement, came upon the most carefully mended one.

"Danna." Sougo sighed in relief softly.

Finding his way back to his futon located in the upper most corner of the dark room, Sougo grasped a tight hold of the 'Danna' doll.

Sougo's head now rested quietly atop a pillow with currently, to him, seemed to be the softest in the universe and dimensions beyond, slowly gave in to slumber.

The whole time, his arms snaked around a doll; now, not only used to satisfy his distasteful personal pleasure in tortue.

It would suffice..at least for now.

**A/N: **I wasn't intentionally going to continue this story because I thought it sucked ass…since it is my first fanfiction after all, but after reading part of the first chapter, it wasn't all that bad, I guess. & Welll, I was also inspired by a recent comment to even make this. Soooo. :B

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